Sad Announcement but bittersweet post

So much has happened since I posted last. It has been crazy around here. I have not had time to blog but popped in and out on facebook.

Lets see, what all has happened. Well the boys are doing good in school. Dakota has finished welding and this last nine weeks he is doing construction. His teacher is an old school mate of Davids. So not only did he go to school and church with David but he now has his son in class.  Dakota is a hands on learner. Dallas is a book learner. You have to know your kids. Dallas has been working on his big biography report of Wyatt Earp.. we are almost finished.  It has been a doozy. I remember Dakota having to do this when he was in 5th grade. He did his on Buffalo Bill Cody.  Both are making good grades and we are in the last nine weeks.

Daddy has been gone a month now and the boys have really helped me out alot. Hunter has came and spent spring break with us. They have worked alot around here and helped me so much I dont know what I would have done without them.
 photo PhotoGrid_1395944989685_zpsspovrocu.jpg  photo IMG_20140324_194309_392_zpsrsmcjobn.jpg  photo IMG_20140323_215720_644_zpse54chivi.jpg  photo IMG_20140324_084216_602_zpsejyifmpx.jpg
I have so many things on my to do list when the weather gets established. Ive got some done. I managed to get my cold stuff in. I planted 27 broccoli plants, 18 cabbage, 0ver 75 onions, radishes, carrots,  and  spinach. It took me from 10 am to 5 pm to do this. I had to go at my own pace. I could not move for a week.  Im fixing to get Dakota to till me another row and plant squash, zuccinni, cucumbers  and okra. When David gets home we will plant corn, potatoes and tomatoes. David is the tomato grower. I make the spaghetti sauce and salsa.

We extended Missys kennel so she has more room but the booger keeps digging holes. Silly girl.

I am still having trouble with my feet and legs. This Plantar Fascitis is killing me. I still have it in both feet. I got a shot in one and I wanted to cry so bad. Ive had to get some of my rings resized because of my hands. I swear if it wasnt for my husband and boys helping, I could not do what I do. But its not getting easier.

We took Dallas on his first turkey hunt for juvenile season. Dakota did all the work cause Ive never been turkey hunting.  photo PhotoGrid_1395526600087_zpsyrytjzun.jpg We didnt see or hear anything. This weekend is opening day for everyone so were going to try again.

Dallas is getting ready for tournament coming up in April. Ive been making him do his katas blindfolded. The object is to make them feel the moves not rely on their eyes. He has been given a challenge to earn his brown belt and skip the blue belt. If he doesnt pass the brown (because it is more of strength and endurance than anything) he will still get his blue. If he passes he gets both. He is up for the challenge. He accepted it with enthusiasm. So he will be in training for the next few months.  photo IMG_20140320_115511_421_zpssrpdwzqn.jpg

The last two girls I was waiting on to have babies finally did. The first was Tasha. photo PhotoGrid_1395000966360_zpsjr96glyd.jpg  photo IMG_20140316_165844_147_zpsjeecovlt.jpg  photo IMG_20140316_171015_970_zpswlwvekjr.jpg  photo PhotoGrid_1395242311946_zpsr4iepnj5.jpg  photo PhotoGrid_1395242258554_zpstnoi93om.jpg
Kidding went well with no problems other than being big babies. Im glad I was here. They were a little slow to start nursing on their own and Tasha kind of got impatient but they finally got the hang of it.
I have religious goats. So far everyone wanted to kid on a Sunday. No lie. Ive missed some church services. The kids finally met the other kids lol  photo IMG_20140316_162507_958_zps6dggeqrl.jpg

The last girl waited to go on a proper day. The very next day. I had been watching her cause I knew I really needed to be there for her cause this was her first baby. We went to feed and I checked her but didnt see any signs of labor but i knew it could be any day now. Well, we were doing our normal chores and I started hearing a noise outside. I looked out to find her in the pasture pushing. Well crap it was cold outside. So I run to her and try to get her in the barn in the kidding pen. Well, shes not budging. She plants them feet and says, Im busy here woman cant you see! I say, well, lets get inside and get the show on the road. Still not budging. If I could have picked her up I would have. Well, in the midst of all this Miracle and Sugar thinks this is a fun game so they want to join in. Their trying to butt me and her and play. So Im trying to keep them back and drag her to the barn at the same time, Im pretty sure it was a sight to see. I finally get Miracle and Sugar back and get her to the barn in the kidding pen. Im heaving and shes hoeing. She finally pops out baby. Shes smallish and hes biggish. She had no idea what just happened and all she knew was IT HURT. She did not know she was suppose to lick it let alone nurse it. I tried to get her to let it nurse and teach her how to be a mommy. She was not having it. She loves on him and takes care of him but will not let him nurse. So my little farm manager Dallas suggested I let her go this year and just let her enjoy her baby and bottle feed him. So I had to intervene and bottle feed. Here is Hans.  photo PhotoGrid_1395242428118_zps6apsfbs1.jpg
This little booger has captured my heart. This is another reason I dont like to bottle feed is cause I GET TOO ATTACHED TO THEM AND THEY GET TOO ATTACHED TO ME WHICH MAKES IT HARD NOT TO GET ATTACHED. See what I mean.  photo IMG_20140321_100039_357_zpsxh1fdp3h.jpg  photo IMG_20140322_103210_401_zpsji9yb5xn.jpg I cant hardly get a thing done. He is right under my feet. He chases the 4 wheeler. Hes like our little puppy. He has us wrapped.  photo IMG_20140324_101334_968_zpsqj6t5mdw.jpg  photo IMG_20140326_104732_500_zpsrbeogeo7.jpg  photo IMG_20140324_192620_606_zpspycb520y.jpg  photo PhotoGrid_1395432193801_zpsfvas8wo4.jpg

They have brought so much joy and newness these past few weeks. But I do have a sad announcement so might as well go ahead and get it over with.

Well Ive put this announcement off long enough. It is with a bittersweet heart i have to post this. Those who really know me will understand my struggle and really knows my heart. You see for a year ive prayed about something and didnt know what to do. I couldnt sleep and i was always not at peace in my mind over the situation. But ive kept it to myself all this time. God has been trying to tell me something and i have not been listening. Hes trying to close a door in my life so he can open another but ive been steadily butting my head against that door to keep it open. But i have finally accepted it and am letting go and letting God work.
Due to some physical disabilities im having trouble keeping up. I am getting physically wore out and down. Im not superwoman and i cant do everything. Ive had to prioritize and come to a conclusion after praying for over a year.
It is with sadness that im am going to have to let my beloved goats go. I cant rodeo 100 and something pound animals anymore. Im having to go low maintenance and just keep my chickens and ducks. Dallas will be taking on that job. Those that know me know i love my goats and this is truly hard decision for me. But when you get to the point to where you cant take care of your family then something is wrong. You see i asked God to make me a wife and mother before a goat rancher. This is my first callings. My husband and my boys are my life. I will be spending the rest of my energy and life taking care of them. My kids are only young once. Ive got to enjoy what time i have left with them while they are at home but ive got to be physically able too. Ive got to let my body rest and build back up if possible.
Now that ive accepted this and prayed God has answered my prayer so specifically and sweetly in the form of an angel named Darlene Ewing. You see shes a good friend of mine who owns goats too. She has so graciously agreed to take in my whole herd as her own. They will not be seperated. They will be continued to be spoiled rotten and well taken care of and loved. She does not understand how greatful i am. I am at peace with this now. I only have a few weeks left with them and i will enjoy every minute of it. The past 10 yrs has been joyful because its brought back childhood memories of my grandparents farm and all the animals. I have learned alot and will continue to help others with all ive learned. I am in several goat groups and we help each other. I will also still use my blog to help others.
Thank you all for understanding and for praying when you didnt even know what i was struggling with. It meant alot.
I will be waiting for God to open the next door in the mean time. If there is not another door i will still be happy cause my husband and human kids come first.
Thank you all once again.

I am truly going to miss all them. But I know I have made the right decision. I am at peace now. I am truly at peace because I know they are going to still be well taken care of. I am so happy for this. I just dread moving day. I will let yall know how it goes.

About 4dfarms

I am a wife to an amazingly dedicated, devoted, and loyal husband whom God sent to me. I am a mother to two wonderful boys to whom I'd give my life for. Around here we have homeschooled, we farm, garden, hunt, fish and anything else we want to do. Although I do have Rheumatoid Arthritis. Sometimes its hard for me to keep up. If it was not for my husband and two boys, I could not do some of what I do. They really do help me alot. We work together as a team in my home. We try our best to train up our children in the fear and admonition of the Lord. Yea, they slip sometimes and correction has to be made. Thats life. I want so badly to be just like the Proverbs 31 woman. My grandmother did an awesome job of it and Id like to fill her shoes.
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2 Responses to Sad Announcement but bittersweet post

  1. Rebekah says:

    Oh, honey, I know how hard of a decision that had to be for you! You’ve got to follow where the Lord leads you, though, not to mention taking care of yourself and your family. Keeping you in my prayers!


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